Backdated Entry... cuz I stopped caring.

First off, apologies because I wrote this blog entry pre-robbery. This entry is mainly about my first day in Beijing.

After our Hot Pot experience, we got up to explore parts of Beijing (which we were quickly learning that a) much bigger than any city I have ever been in and b) has too many relics. It’s like Paris meets LA, during rush hour. It doesn’t help that the taxi drivers are not the most helpful in the world.
We spent the day at Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. Tiananmen is a big massive open area, and when I saw massive, it’s pretty massive. There were many tourists and locals on the square, flying kites, talking, taking pictures, and so on. The square was also full of scam artists and hawkers.
Oh, hawkers, how I want to punch thee in the face. But, you probably know Kung Fu so I’ll just say “No” 47 ½ times.
The scam artists are very interesting. A young, good looking Chinese girl will come up to you speaking perfect English. She usually asks you where you are from, how long you have been in Bejiing.

Bitch: Hello sir.
Ken: Hello (rolls eyes)
Bitch: I Chinese student learning English. I practice English on you, yes?
Ken: No.
Bitch: What brings you to Beijing.
Ken: I live here in Dengchung District (south of Tiananmen, near the diplomatic apartments).
Bitch: I would like to show you to some museums.
Ken: No, leave me alone, thanks. (end of scene, return to top and repeat in three minutes)

The Museums they offer are actually rooms with paintings usually mass produced. If you go in (which I didn’t, I was highly warned against this), they will basically force you to purchase way overpriced bad art, or take you a tea room where you’ll pay 1,200-1,400 RMB ($200) to sample tea.
The hawkers are usually selling cheap goods you can bargain for. I wanted a Little Red Book, but I assume I’ll find them somewhere else. They also had Mao Hats. No, Larry, you’re not getting a Mao hat.

I literally joked as we were walking to the Forbidden City, “I wonder of the Forbidden City is really a City?”
Haha.
Yea, it is.
The Forbidden City is massive. Literally, we kept walking and the buildings and gardens just went everywhere. In order even to get to the Emperor’s house, you have to walk through nine gates. Yea, nine.
Pictures are better than words. Check it out.

We spent about 5 hours wandering the Forbidden City, and I was so impressed by the detailing and the craftsmanship of the whole area. For being almost 500 years old, the vast majority of it is in good condition. However, there were several parts that were off limits because Beijing is getting ready for the Olympics.
Actually, the Olympics is all Beijing residents like to talk about. They always say to me “Come back to Olympic.”

Please Mind the Gap – And screw you scam artists.

Ken

Fun Times?

I was robbed in Xi'an today. My camera was taken in a market. I wasn't paying attention to my surroundings and paid the price. Money too.

I am going to have to figure out how to take pictures of the next, oh 15 days of trip? ... shitty.

ken

I found internet... Beijing Day One

I'm literally uploading pictures as fast as I can. These first are from my first day in Beijing. This is Tianimiman Square and the Forbidden City. Enjoy. I will write more later.







I'm literally uploading pictures as fast as I can. These first are from my first day in Beijing. This is Tianimiman Square and the Forbidden City. Enjoy. I will write more later.

Ladies and Gentleman...

Well, the ethernet adapter on my computer is most likely fried. Apple is not sure what's wrong with it. They think the ethernet plug might need to be replaced. It looks like you are not going to get any blog entries from me for this trip.

Sorry, there's not much I can do. I'm using my travel companion's computer, which has a German keyboard (and just a little difficult to type on). This is just not going to work.

It makes me very upset to have to say that....

Ken

Smiles

First off, I must apologize because this post really deserved pictures, and I left my camera at the hotel.

Hello from Beijing. We arrived safely in Beijing, and ran into some other Hong Kong University students who were coming to Beijing the same weekend as us. After chatting throughout all the custom’s formalities, we went our separate ways and decided to run into each other tonight for dinner or to meet tomorrow.

Anyways, we took a taxi to our hotel in central Beijing. We’re staying a courtyard hotel in what’s traditionally referred to as a “hutong,” Chinese for narrow alley. Hutong are traditional Chinese neighborhoods, they are single-stories with narrow one-way streets with shops lining the outside and homes on the inside.

Our hotel is very nice. I will take pictures tomorrow of it – it’s way too dark to do so.
Anyways, Johannes and I wait around until about 6:30 p.m. for the other HKU students to call us. Unfortunately they didn’t, so out of starvation we decide to go looking for food. Our hotel lady told us to go “Left than Right,” but because I am a dumbass, I went Left, Left, Right to eat.
So we end up walking down some narrow streets of Beijing, where it’s literally below freezing.

We’re not going to go far for food, and we see this little tiny place that looks somewhat busy with good furniture and decide to step in.

No one speaks English, but we realize that the restaurant serves “Hot Pot.” Hot Pot is basically a fire-burning oven placed in front of your table with boiling water in it. They bring you meet and vegetables and you cook it yourself.

Our very nice server doesn’t speak a word of English, but continues to rattle on to us in Mandarin like we’re conversational in Chinese (and we’re just the silent types). Here’s our conversation:

Ken: Ni Hao (Points to hot pot at another table and smiles)
Server: Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin (smiles and points to the hot pot on the table).
Ken: (Smiles). “Xie Xie” (thank you.)
Server: Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin (opens up our menus, which we didn’t open, points to a spattering of things) Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin.
Ken: (Smiles)

I think I ordered food.

I’ve never had hot pot in my life. I have no idea how to eat it.

However, the food arrives, it’s absolutely amazing. Basically you take the vegetables, and meet, boil it, then dip it into a peanut sauce (which can be flavored how you want).

Server: Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin (takes various things and puts it in my peanut dip)
Ken: (Smiles)

The food was so great. I was absolutely thrilled – I love little hole in the walls, and we were absolutely stuffed, even though we had no idea what we ordered, how we ordered or how much the bill was).

We get the bill – it comes to 94 yuan (about 12 bucks). We ordered enough food for four people. So we split it, and it comes to like 48 yuan a person. Not bad. Well, I hand her a 100 yuan bill and she brings me change.

Server: Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin (hands back 6 yuan and smiles)
Ken: Smiles and begins to place the 6 yuan on the table as a tip.
Server: Laughs out loud, Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin Mandarin. (hands the 6 yuan back to us).
Ken: (Smiles and takes the money back).

No Tipping I guess.

So, that’s my first day. I’d write more creatively, but I am a bit tired. We’re going to the Forbidden City tomorrow. Should be fun.

Please Mind the Gap – And Smile.

Ken

Off I Go

Play at home folks. We'll play connect the dots. Fun Fun. Wish me luck.

Ken

Woo!

I just kicked my only final exam's ass. It was four essay questions, and you could choose two to write on. One was Hong Kong's economy with China and another was Hong Kong's air pollution.

I could write a doctoral thesis on both of those subjects. I've done a presentation on question 1 and written enough Bloomberg stories on question 2 to be the Hong Kong Air Pollution beat reporter.

It's nice to be good at school again.

Ken

This needs no explanation.

The Lonely Planet guide book I bought about China has a chapter about the Mongol invasion.

It's titled "The Wrath of Khan."

Wow....

Is Wolf Blitzer Going to have to slap a....

Lordy. Lordy.

It was like God smiled, then struck me with a lightning bolt.

Hong Kong decided, I think collectively, to put everything on sale.

Like, everything. Seriously, you need a list?!

Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Paul Smith, Valentino, Ralph Lauren, Prada, Tod's, Dior, YSL, Columbia Sports Company, Nike, Cole Haan, Lacoste, Givenchy, Juicy Couture....

It goes on. The English department store Harvey Nichols, considered one of the most exclusive stores in fashiondom, is having a 40 percent off sale.

Why do they have to be so cruel? The only store not being cruel is Chanel, who thankfully, never puts anything on sale. If you didn't know Chanel burns everything they don't sell. That makes my day.

Ken

Today Covet Item. Take a wild f'kin' guess.

Victoria Peak

Here's some pictures from my trip up to Victoria Peak today. Enjoy

Colonialism is Pretty

Let's say you run a civilization. At some point during your history, you decide you need more space, and figure that well, China's the way to go. So, when you arrive in the Pearl River Delta, what do you do? Do you:

• A - Build a trading post, adapting to the 3,000-year-old Chinese Culture in the area.
  
• B - Build a trading post, deciding that any local culture somehow falls beneath your great civilization. Local culture? Ha!
  
• C - Build a trading post, get bored, build a casino or 20.
  
• D - A mixture of B and C, with just enough Catholicism to keep from going to Hell.
  

I love Macau.

I took a day trip to Macau today. Macau, the strange colonial bedfellow of China, was founded by the Portuguese 500 years ago (Woah). After holding onto this tiny tiny tiny island (two kilometers by one kilometer), for centuries, the Portuguese gave it back to China in 1999. However, they left a very interesting impression on this little island.

First off, it's the only place in China you can gamble. I never equated the Portuguese with gambling, but I never equated the Portuguese with much in the first place so I obviously needed a place to start. They are kinda the strange cousin of Europe who lives by the beach all the time. I know my European friends will enjoy that. We love stereotypes.

Macau is actually really cool though. Hong Kong and Macau both were founded around the same time, but Hong Kong took a "historical building? Fuck that - let's put a car park here" attitude. So, in Macau, you have cobblestone streets, European architecture, and more churches than you can shake a Bishop's staff at.

The architecture was pretty awesome. The streets were all cobblestone, with beautiful frescoes, cute little shops. You'd think you were in some quaint Portuguese or Mediterranean town in Europe -- that somehow was having the largest Chinese tour group in history coming through.

I was also thoroughly entertained by the money in Macau. Macau uses it's own currency - the Pataca. Other than winning the "Hard Consonant Word of the Day," it's probably the least used currency on the face of the planet. It's pegged to the Hong Kong Dollar (which in turn is pegged to the U.S. Dollar). And, funny thing, the currency is in the minority on the island. According to their Monetary Authority, Patacas make up only 22.3 percent of all Macauese currency in circulation. The More You Know. I took some home with me, cuz I like useless money.

Pictures anyone?

Okay, so, yea... Macau likes the Church. A lot of very large, massive, ''power of Christ'' churches. The one that's pretty popular is St. Paul's Cathedral ruins. This was built like 400 years ago and then God got angry some time in the 1800s and decided to burn the entire thing down.

All that's left is the facade in the front. However, it's a pretty massive facade. You can see the whole city, and its casinos, from the facade's second floor.

Cultural Imperialism time though. Since I got to Hong Kong, I have been warned not to take photos of any inner sanctums of the temples here. St. Paul's has a crypt, a fairly nice one, filled with bones and stuff. Obviously God didn't like the architecture, but had a thing for the skeletons.

Anyways, there are signs everywhere saying that say ''this is a sacred place, please respect it.'' Really didn't see it from the Chinese there. It was kinda sad. They were touching things, and taking goofy pictures. I was a little flustered.

Okay more pictures of churches, ready set go:





Sorry, I had to do it. The Power of Christ compelled me to take this picture. I feel my soul rotting.

Okay, enough of good ol' fashion religion. Let's see sin! It's what everyone comes to Macau for anyways:



Woo! Casinos! Steve Wynn just opened a casino last month in Macau. It's the big super-hot place to be right now. It looks deathly familiar... to Las Vegas.









Speaking of Vegas. I wanted to share this picture. This looks like the other Macau streets I have taken pictures of, yes? Wrong! This is a new Casino. In good old Las Vegas style, they built a whole cultural center to emulate old Macau. Except, well, old Macau is like one kilometer from here.

I didn't get it. I think they should have done Paris. That would have at least been in the spirit of Vegas.


The food was actually really good in Macau. It's a mixture of Portuguese and Chinese food. Take that Californian infusion cuisine! The Portuguese got to this idea before you! I did spoil myself though. I ordered a wonderful rack of lamb and a great bottle of wine, and sat on a cobble stone street reading a book. It was heaven in some Portuguese Chinese Gambling Catholic weird sort of way.

Please Mind the Gap - and the Sin.

Ken

PS: Find me 40 bottles of this wine, and I will love you forever. I couldn't find it for the life of me.

And you thought U.S. Flying Sucks

Ken: "Hello nice travel agent. I would like to book two flights from Kathmandu, Nepal to Dehli, India."
Agent: "Certainly Rich American. We have three flight options for you."
Ken: "How splendid. Please give me those options."
Agent: "Well, we have Airline A, B and C. Airline A we aren't sure exists anymore."
Ken: "Oh... well, why are you trying to sell me this?"
Agent: "It's the cheapest."
Ken: "I can imagine. Next option, please."
Agent: "Certainly rich American. We have Airline B. Airline B doesn't fly to Dehli right now, but will next month."
Ken:"Oh, so it's expanding? Excellent, I'll take those tickets."
Agent: "Oh, you misunderstood me Rich American. I said they don't fly to Dehli right now, I didn't say they were expanding."
Ken: "So, why don't they fly to Dehli right now."
Agent: "Poor safety record. I think they forgot to hire mechanics or something. Big Nepalese Scandal."
Ken: "Next airline please."
Agent: "Certainly rich American. You can fly Airline C. Airline C is expensive."
Ken: "Well, okay."
Agent: "Very Expensive."
Ken: "Aren't I the rich American?"
Agent: "Certainly you are sir. But you can't afford this ticket. Plus, they require you get pick up the ticket in Kathmandu. I think you have to be Nepali to fly them. Are you Nepali, Mr. Sweet?"
Ken: "I'm not in Kathmandu. I was hoping for an e-ticket. No, I'm American, remember?"
Agent: "Oh, yes.... hmm. Well, Airline C is a good option. Can you wire me your deposit and we'll see if the flight is open for non-Nepalese?"
Ken: "I'm going to take a bus."
Agent: "Call back next week. Some other airlines might start up between now and then."

Sadly, this conversation is pretty much verbatum.

Please Mind the Gap - and get me out of Nepal.
~Ken

Who knew I would be happy to have a long layover?

On January 5th, I fly from Dehli to Singapore. I get there in the morning (430 a.m. to be precise). I then leave Singapore for Hong Kong at 7 p.m. and get into Hong Kong at 1045 p.m. on the 6th.

So, I get to spend the whole day wandering around in Singapore. Woo, another stamp!

Usually I hate long layovers... but I get to wander Singapore now! I'll make sure to leave my cocaine, pornography, cigarettes and malaysian newspapers at home then.

Ken

Indiana Ken

Ladies and Gentleman, we're starting to wind down here in Hong Kong. I leave for the United States on January 9th. But, I still have a month left here in China. But, would it be appropriate for me to leave Asia on such a boring, downturn note?

Hell fuckin' no.


I'm doing a 23-day trip into Asia. That hand-written ticket is my ticket from Hong Kong to Beijing. Yea... plane ticket is hand written. How cool is that? Here's my travel plans. Links brought to by Wikipedia, the wiki-est pedia out there.

• December 16th - Hong Kong to Beijing. My friend Johannes from Germany and I will travel the Forbidden City, The Great Wall and other parts of China's capital.
• December 19th, evening - First-class train from Beijing to Xi'an. We will arrive in the morning of the 20th. Xi'an is one of China's most ancient cities. Hopefully we will see the Terracotta Soldiers, ancient pagotas, etc.
  
• December 22nd, morning - Fly from Xi'an to Chengdu. Chengdu, also another very ancient city has.... pandas!!!!! Yay Pandas! In Chengdu we will meet Jordan from Canada, and prepare for our trip into...
• December 24th, morning - Fly from Chengdu to Lhasa, in Tibet. I will spend Christmas in Tibet. That will include the Patola Palace, Tibetan monestaries, the highest lake in the world.
  
• December 28th - Johannes leaves us, he has great and wonderous things to see. But, Jordan and I continue on to Shigatse and Mount Everest Base Camp. Hot.... or... well, more cold. Things get a little, unexact here, because of where we are going from to where we are going to. We however, before New Years eve, will arrive in...
• December 31st - Kathmandu, Nepal. Shangri-la. We will spend three days in Nepal, seeing the scenary, and other stuff. I'd give you specifics, but there's just too much.
• January 4th - We fly from Kathmandu to Dehli, India. We plan to visit Agra, where the Taj Mahal is, and also see what we can in India during our limited amount of time.
• January 7th - evening. I fly back to Hong Kong, via Malaysia. I would like to get out, get my passport stamp and get back in my plane... hehe, yay passport stamps.
  

That's it. I will then fly back from Hong Kong to Los Angeles then onto Phoenix on the 9th of January, spend a few days in Phoenix with the folks, and then onto:

Columbia! Probably stopping in St. Louis to see Danny and Ian. That's like what, Beijing, Xi'an, Chengdu, Lhasa, Shigatse, Kathmandu, Dehli, Agra, Khula Lampour, Hong Kong, Los Angeles, Phoenix, St. Louis, Columbia... 13 city destinations in a month? Woah.

I plan on blogging as much of the trip I can. We are heading into parts of the world that are pretty much cut off from civilization. However, I cannot express how excited I am! Please, let me here your comments.

Please Mind the Gap -- and Mount Everest.
~Ken

Don't Cry for me...

There's a Chinese person singing "Evita" at the top of his lungs in the shower.

... that is all.

Like a Black Man at a Croquet Match

First off, sorry for not posting recently. Life's been busy, and I haven't traveled or done anything that incredibly exciting here in Hong Kong. However, I have some things to update ya about.

So, I'm starting to realize what it means to be a minority in another country. It took three months, but I'm starting to notice it more and more. I'm not insulted by it, cuz I'll share some examples with you, but more, well, frustrated.

I've only recently started noticing things the Hong Kong-ese do when I, or a group of white people, come into the picture. I think I noticed it completely when I had a series of things happen to me.

Anyways, in the morning I get on my bus. I started noticing that always seem to have the seats next to me open. I especially noticed it one day when I got on a very crowded bus last week, and no matter how crowded the bus was, no one would sit next to me. I shower people, I shower.

I then went to a press conference. I signed in and sat on a couch, by myself like usual, and the security guard walked up to me.

Guard: "Sir, do you work for The South China Morning Post?" (the main english-based newspaper in town. The Post reporter is sitting across from me, she's a very nice Japanese lady.)
Me: "No, I'm with Bloomberg. She's over there."
Guard: "Sorry sir, I assumed you were with the Post because...."
Me: "Because why?"
Guard: "Nothing sir, have a good day."

The press conference was held by a very important gentleman in the community. He did his speech in English, and then took all his questions in Cantonese. There were six white people there standing around, occasionally asking a nice Hong Kong reporter what he's saying.

He could obviously see us. I'm standing in his fucking face with a tape recorder.

So I headed home, on my bus with my own seat, and went to grab dinner at a local restaurant. I was placed in the back, in a special section that had forks and water instead of chopsticks and tea in front of it.

Can I have any more stereotypes placed upon me?

Oh, a tuna sandwich with Mayo on white bread. Thanks!

Please Mind the Gap, and The Man,
Ken

Because Hong Kong Pop-Culture is not complete without YouTube

This video is so famous in Hong Kong, you can buy t-shirts with him on it. He even has a wikipedia entry... how awesome is that?

Sorry!

So... yea, I know I haven't posted in this thing in awhile. Would I be a horrible person to say that nothing is going on here in Hong Kong? It's just the usual: Work, School, Exploring the City, etc. There's nothing been interesting to write about, until this afternoon:

I went walking down Antique Street in Central Hong Kong today to look for gifts for people. Other than expensive Tea Sets I found a corner in Hong Kong that sold, of all things, Ivory.

Yea --- Ivory. That super-illegal material made of dead elephant tusks.

So, because I had no soul, I went in to look. Honestly, it was the first reasonable items I have seen. Ivory has long been prized for its ability for carving.

I found a few things that I actually liked --- very intricate, very beautiful, and very very illegal.

Oh well. I'll buy it anyways, and put the Ivory with my Absinthe, Blood Diamonds, Cuban Cigars and a Cambodian or Vietnamese baby in my luggage.

Illegal items are so awesome.

~Ken

Post's Covet Item: A trip into Tibet.

Gift Time!!!

Okay, because it seems to be that only my mother leaves comments on my Blog, I'm now requesting comments.

What do you want from China?

If you could have anything from China, please tell me. Ask, and you will have -within reason. Some suggestions - Tea, Tea Sets, Clothing, Sculptures, Jade, etc.

If there is something you're really dying for, and it's a little pricy, let me know and I can find it for you. I gotta know now because I will be searching the City for things, and I will be heading into China next month.

So, send me your material desires, Material Girls (and boys).

Please Mind The Gap,
Ken

This post's Covet Item --- Well, you're the one's coveting things. Tell me!!!